Social Anxiety

2 Timothy 1:7 KJV: For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power and of love and of a sound mind.

This week in the anxiety series, I wanted to tackle social anxiety.  Similar to insomnia, this form of anxiety is experienced on a continuum, with most of us being able to relate to the mechanics of social anxiety.  

At its core, social anxiety is not about being around people; it’s about social evaluation.  Unlike a panic disorder, where the mind is hypervigilant, scanning the body for physical sensations that are interpreted as dangerous, in social anxiety, the mind is hyperfocused on how one is being perceived.  All the attention goes to how your voice sounds, how you look, what you say, and whether you talk too much or too little.  Add to this a hyperawareness, looking for evidence in other people of how you are being perceived.  

With social anxiety, there is a negative interpretive bias, assigning excessive certainty and interpretation to very ambiguous evidence. She didn’t respond to my text; she’s probably upset with me. I wasn’t invited; they must not like me. He looked at his watch; what I’m saying must not be important. 

While these may be normal thoughts that run through our minds, with social anxiety, they are compounded by post-event processing.  Every part of a conversation, including body language and responses, gets over-analyzed.  However, repeatedly reviewing the encounter preferentially retrieves the negative details and reinforces the anxiety. 

You can imagine where this ultimately leads: overexplaining, rehearsing conversations, seeking reassurance, editing yourself, and finally withdrawing and avoiding situations.  

Just like generalized anxiety, panic attacks, and insomnia, this isn’t just an issue with our thoughts. Social-evaluative threats trigger the typical anxiety responses of sympathetic nervous system activation, including increased heart rate, sweating, GI sensations, flushing, difficulty concentrating, etc. 

This verse offers a powerful remedy for social anxiety.  First, Paul reminds us that fearful timidity is not what God has given us.  What he gives us is power.  This word in Greek means strength, power, or ability.  It reminds me of what courage is: not the absence of fear, but the ability to move through something despite it.  How is that possible, you might ask?  The answer is in that second word: love.  Love takes the focus off ourselves and shifts it outward.  Instead of obsessing over how others perceive you, you can ask yourself how you can contribute to someone else’s sense of belonging and security. 

Finally, this verse tells us God has given us a sound mind. The word belongs to the Greek sōphrōn family, carrying the ideas of sound judgment, self-control, moderation, and a mind functioning with proper proportion. With a sound mind, I can evaluate what actually happened with proportion, rather than allowing anxiety to determine what I think happened.  

For the art piece, I wanted to suggest self-evaluative and negative thoughts as linear attacks that pierce our thoughts. The subject’s chain belt references the two-fold gut sensations of social anxiety and how we can become imprisoned and stuck in isolation when the anxiety is unmanaged.  The sky outside is meant to be ambiguous: is there a storm or blue skies? It’s a reminder that with social anxiety, the imbalance can be in the interpretation. 

But here’s the thing: whether the sky is blue or stormy, you can still choose to show up with love and courage, despite your fears.